2007-01-18 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, this didn't go well with Hell, and Spawn was born to attempt to end the battle with the villains.

2007-01-18 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, there is no exiting Hell... muhuwahahahahaaaaaaa!

2007-01-18 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, Spawn lived in a suburb of hell called Belgium, where he ingested many Belgians and Belgian waffles.

2007-01-18 [iippo]: Unfortunately, those Belgian waffles gave Spawn a heart burn. He went to the doctor's who discovered that he had a cancerous growth in his abdomen.

2007-01-19 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, the cancer was caught right away, and Spawn was able to undergo cancer treatment.

2007-01-19 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, they discovered that the cancerous growth was actually a member of a German heavy metal band, who Spawn had accidentally swallowed during a drunken Oktoberfest binge.

2007-01-20 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the beer was awesome!

2007-01-23 [Annie]: Unfortunately, the band was drowned in all of the beer and eventually digested.

2007-01-23 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they sounded better after they came back out than they did before!

2007-01-23 [iippo]: Unfortunately they sounded so good that everyone wanted to listen to them so badly that they just dowloaded the band's music as MP3s through limewire and the band didn't get paid, ever again.

2007-01-23 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, this forced them back into the indy scene, which prevented them from selling out and writing pathetic, uninteresting, uncreative trendoid crap.

2007-01-24 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, their indy music was still uninteresting and uncreative. This led to their re-signing by a large corporate record label.

2007-01-27 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, this saved all of the people who thought they enjoyed indy from having to listen to their music.

2007-01-29 [iippo]: Unfortunately, this roller coaster of fame and hate drove the band members into a cult, and they committed group suicide naked under the blue moon.

2007-01-30 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, a passing amateur writer saw them and wrote a screenplay about it, thus guaranteeing himself a place in the annals of history.

2007-02-03 [iippo]: Unfortunately, the screenplay-made-into-a-movie just made the cult even more popular and crazy misguided kids in the thousands followed in the band's footsteps and committed naked group suicides.

2007-02-03 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, the band ran out of crazy misguided kids. That said, they decided to start writing anti-naked-group-suicide songs, which were very well received by their only remaining audience; elderly women and politicians.

2007-02-04 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, they were dead, and couldn't actually pull it off, because ghosts really aren't into that sort of thing. The elderly women and politicians could listen to their songs because elderly women are almost dead anyway, and politicians all have one foot in hell by default. (oops, i am not PC. apologies)

2007-02-08 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the Wal Mart officials came to visit from the other side, to warn the politicians of their possible fate.

2007-02-27 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, the politicians didn't listen to them, and thus the land became more and more corrupt, and the world was rife with war.

2007-02-27 [iippo]: Fortunately, this only lasted for about a year and then everything kind of turned out just alright, and a lot of people could see in retrospect that all the horribleness and the catastrophes were really a part of the bigger plan to make more puppies happy in the world.